Then why do some of us persist in trying to create the impossible - no, not a perpetual motion machine, but even less likely - A DOCILE ROBOT?
And this stupid genius didn't even create just any run of the mill robot...he had to choose the worst animal ever for his evil creation. That's right...he made a squirrel.
Now, I've carefully documented the evilness of squirrels before. So why do we still think this is a good idea?
And, to put the cherry on top of the pie...he's making a squirrel robot that is a cell phone people can use in public. I mean, obviously cell phones weren't annoying enough. No, it doesn't suck enough to carry them around like a leash all the time...and listen to people talk into them endlessly on public transportation, or hear them go off incessantly in class. They do have their uses...like you're driving down a deserted highway hours from the nearest town, and you get attacked by werewolves, and you need to call the police so your family and friends can know what happened....but not that many.
Now this stupid genius wants us to have cell phones that crawl around and follow us (maybe even be led by a leash), and get our attention by staring at us, or maybe biting our feet off. Does anyone think this is a good idea...even if it weren't going to be annoying to everyone else in the world? I mean, if real squirrels (animals which lack intelligence and strength) are already killing dogs and eating our watermelon...what do you think smart squirrels with titanium strength and access to all of our phone numbers are going to do when they get fed up with following us around and being led around by leashes? Can you say, telemarketers?
I watched the film clip you can find over at Althouse (I won't post such vile material anywhere near my site). I know it doesn't look like it can walk yet, but you know it's just a matter of time. But doesn't the gleam in the squirrel-phone's eye look evil? Doesn't it already look sick of serving? Doesn't that just prove my point ever more? I mean, how much evidence do we need to
Don't say I didn't warn you, 'cause I just did.
I think we've already had enough evidence that this is a bad idea. I think now we need to arrange for this guy to go squirrel hunting with Dick Cheney.
How many more, Mr. Speaker? How many more?
Update: Welcome, Carnival of Comedy Readers! You are more than welcome to look around. You might want to take a look at these posts:
Frank J is a Liberal!!!
The Great Beards in History Series (The link goes to the first, and from there you can check them all out.. .)
The rest of my stuff just isn't as funny...it's got a quirky sense of humor, but it's mostly about current events and my life...
I hope you enjoy the site, and drop me a comment if you do...